Decision Making: From Fear-Based to Purpose-Aligned

Research and studies on human behavior have documented that we make 80% of our decisions in life based out of fear rather than our desires. Incredible statistic, isn’t it? I spoke at a networking group of business owners a few weeks ago about how to make decisions that are purpose-aligned rather than fear-based. My approach to purpose-aligned decision making comes from my varied experiences as marketing consultant, yoga instructor, and business/life coach. And so we walked through each.

Purpose-aligned decision making from the perspective of:

Your yoga instructor.  We began with a meditation – eyes closed, in a comfortable, seated position with both feet on the floor. This quote comes from Sarah Ban Breathnach and says:  “Each time you experience the new, you become receptive to inspiration. Each time you try something different, you let the Universe know you are listening. Trust your instincts. Believe your yearnings are blessings. If you are willing to step out in faith and take a leap in the dark, you will discover that your choices are as authentic as you are.” ‘Nuf said.

Your personal/professional coach. When I work with people who feel stuck in their lives, I always start with what is at the “heart” of the matter. That is, what are your dreams and desires?  What are the things that you are most passionate about? What could you do for hours without noticing the time? These things are your “purpose” in life. Put a bookmark there for a moment.

Your marketing consultant. When working with companies and businesses that need to get a handle on their sales and marketing, we always begin with a marketing plan. It helps map out a company’s vision/mission, goals, target audience and tactics for successful marketing execution. We can use the same format for our own lives in order to help us take action and make decisions that are purpose-aligned. Think of it in terms of four boxes:

1.       Dreams and Desires (Vision/Mission)

2.       People in Your Life (Target Audience)

3.       What You’re Aiming For (Goals and Objectives)

4.       How You Live Your Life (Tactics)

Look back to your discoveries around your dreams and desires and the things you are most passionate about – a.k.a. your purpose. This is the vision/mission for your life. Your target audience is the people you love, interact with, and want to be with. Your goals and objectives are those things that you’d like to do with your life, and the tactics are how you live your life in accordance with the people you love and your purpose. In other words, what you do each day to satisfy the purpose/mission/vision for your life.

Now, decision making becomes rather simple. When confronted with a decision, instead of moving to the fear-based response (which is almost always an “if/then” response that feels forced or limiting), ask yourself if it is aligned with your four boxes: your dreams/desires, the people in your life, what you’re aiming for and how you want to live your life. If you can say yes to each of these, then it’s a no-brainer. If you can’t say yes to each of them, it’s time to explore how that decision isn’t in alignment and if you can get it to a place of alignment. Then, move forward with confidence! 

If you'd like to receive a copy of the purpose-aligned worksheet, send me an email. 

Stepping Out of Routine

Last Friday, something incredible happened: I had nothing scheduled in the afternoon. No meetings. No conference calls. No work that HAD to be completed. What to do with the free time? I had wanted to visit a local library and peruse some books and maybe pick up a couple of movies for the weekend. So I went!

It's an "Anythink" library, and very different from the traditional, stuffy libraries I remember going to when I was younger. "SHHH" is a four-letter word (or so the library café server's t-shirt said) and videos are rented and dispensed Red Box-style. You check out books on your own using a computer scanner, and there are many places to sit and read, or work, or just daydream.

I started my library adventure by first ordering a cup of chai. As I waited for the library barista to whip up my hot drink, I noticed the people sitting at the nearby tables with their computers and coffees, just working and collaborating with one another. I spun around and saw the abundance of DVDs ready for me to peruse. Down the way, there was a computer workstation area where people were working on their own and also helping one another out with whatever it was they were doing.

I got my chai and walked over to the DVDs where I immediately picked out three that looked appealing. Of course, they were older movies, but ones that I had never seen before. And, they were FREE! Then, I meandered over to the business books section where it felt as if a couple of books were just calling to me. At Anythink, they organize the books by title instead of author, and it was just strange to me that those two books were on the same shelf. I walked down the aisle a bit further and turned the corner only to find a book displayed that also captured my attention. By now, I was looking like a library junkie, with my 3 DVDs and 3 books stacked in my arms. But it felt good. And, did I mention they were all FREE?

Then, I continued meandering and found my way to a cozy area of comfy chairs situated around a fireplace with a sign hanging above that just said "relax". I knew this was the place for me. For the next two hours there I sat - reading, jotting down notes, and sipping my chai. Nirvana.

Pretty soon, the lights started flicking off and on, signaling that the library was getting ready to close. 5:30 already? Where had the time gone?

As I walked out in the cool air with my books and DVDs in hand (all free for me to use for the next couple of weeks) I couldn't help but think that this had truly been an exceptional afternoon. One where I stepped out of routine and felt so much better for having done it.

What can you do this week that is outside of your normal routine? Who knows, maybe it'll change your entire perspective.